The fictional profile.

Mattias Lincoln is the president of the University Law Students Society. He has a lucky top hat and has been known to carry a cane. Although people see him as one of the highest achievers in the faculty of law, he assures me that he is secretly a bit of an underachiever who would rather watch ABC’s newest legal drama “Crownies”, than actually do any of his readings.

“I thought that having scraped into law with the minimum UAI, it would all be a breeze. Then I failed contract law in my first session at university.”

Having grown up in Wollongong, attending local schools, the University of Wollongong seemed like an obvious choice once the decision to continue studying had been made. “That and the fact that the UAI for law, was lower than anywhere in Sydney.” He says.

“My parents desperately wanted me to go into teaching or do an apprenticeship. Possibly one of the motivating factors for me to finish my law degree, is that they didn’t think I could do it.”

“I have always idolised Denny Crane from Boston Legal. People told me that was a stupid reason to study law, but I maintain it was an appropriate and well thought out reason.”

He also didn’t want to be stuck doing anything physical. Although enjoying the occasional run, he admits that physical activity really isn’t his thing, and that the only physical activities he enjoys, are the ones that he gets to cum at the end of. He agrees that maintaining a balance is important but argues that it can be easily achieved with minimal physical exertion.

Since becoming president of the LSS, and entering his third year at university, Mattias has fine tuned the art of being a student. He spends a proportionate amount of time studying, socialising, travelling and getting drunk. He has tried moving out of home, decided he didn’t like it, and moved back. He has also developed a voraciously healthy interest in reading for leisure and admits that if he isn’t watching legal dramas, he’ll be reading one.

When asked about his family, he jokingly says there is a strong possibility he is adopted. Although his family are kind and supportive and his mum makes a mean pumpkin soup, Mattias feels he bares no resemblance to them personality wise.

“My sister is an interesting character. She wants to be a bird when she grows up and she enjoys repeating everything I say. It’s unacceptable, even if she is only 5.”

His biggest achievement so far is passing property law, although he says that becoming president of the LSS goes close to being number one. Mattias only has two more years until he graduates and he plans to be a judge by the time he is 30. He wants to fight crime, in an air conditioned office, a suit, and while sipping on a large skinny flat white with 1 sugar.

His advice to new students is worth taking on board. He says “In the paraphrased and slightly inaccurate words of the great Spock “Stumble forth and try to prosper.”