2012!

It's a year for fun, hopes and dreams. It's a year for love and success. It's a year for realisations, hurdles and triumph. It's a year of summer and winter and everything in between. It's a year where I will be challenged and fearful, yet determined and strong. It is a year for friendship and wonder. It's a year that I will not be hesitating in. Here is to he beginning of something, and the end of something else. Here is to 2012.

Santa Clause has been to town

It's that one special day of the year when children wake up at 5 am because they are so excited about Santa and all the presents he has left behind. That time when everyone is just a little bit happier and more generous. I often think about those spending christmas alone, or those who have nothing. I feel happy because I too am celebrating with my family, getting lovely presents, eating incredible food and spending time at the beach just generally being merry.

I think about those people who have nothing and I feel sad for them. I feel like I want to help them. I think about Somalian refugees and old people with no family left. I think about those who are sick and in need,  who have lost loved ones and those who have nowhere to go. There is a lot of sadness and despair in the world, and I see that all the time, but at this time of year it can be masked by merriment. I often wonder how I can help, and where I can even start, but I do know that it makes me appreciate what I have so much more.  So today I will be merry, enjoy my presents, and spend time with the people I love, but I will spare a thought for people less fortunate because that is what christmas is about to me.

Merry Christmas!

Germany.

It's this tiny little country, that likes to steal my friends. I know saying goodbye to people is hard I expect it. I make friends with people from overseas, and I know that eventually they will leave. I think maybe it will get easier but it never does. Not even a little bit. That final hug, that final kiss, that urgency to make known how much you are going to miss someone, and how much you love them. All the conversations you have ever had, pop into your mind, all the great times you had together, blur by, everything blurs together and the next thing you know, you are driving off, down a dreary highway, rain pelting down, with "Never let me go" blaring out of the radio and you just can't fight the tears anymore, even though you so desperately want to. 

I just want you to know though, that you always make me smile. I have never felt safer than when I was in your arms for cuddles, and I have never told anyone half the things I told you. I will miss you more than I can really stand to think about and the night I told you not to come to close because I smelt like sunscreen and tasted like saltwater and you said "Yes, but that's just you", was the most important thing anyone has ever said to me because at that moment I knew that I never had to fake anything about myself with you because you just appreciated me the way I am. 

You are so very important.

Homebake baby!

It's that time of year again. Festival season, summer, the festive season. It's all happening. To kick off these general festivities on Saturday was Homebake. The all Australian music/comedy/film festival. It was a perfect, summers day in Sydney, lots of bikinis and short denim shorts.

The day kicked off with the Rubens, triple J unearthed winners, and continued with such classy Australian acts as Housos, and some fantastic Australian music with Drapht, The Jezabels and the awe inspiring Eskimo Joe.  Ladyhawke, our sweet as NZ cousin also  rocked the stage, pleasing fans with My Delirium as her final song.

What made this day even more special, was when it was all over, and everyone was walking back through Martin place, the Christmas tree and all the decorations reminded us that it is Christmas time.

The simple life.

The other day, I fooled myself into thinking life was simple. I had a day off, I stayed in bed late, I watched trashy movies, I drank hot chocolate from my favourite mug, I sat by the window working on my novel watching soft rain falling over the ocean. I almost believed that nothing else mattered in that moment. I actually almost fooled myself. 

Goodbyes.

"Never say goodbye. Because saying goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting."

 I need your calmness. I need your positive energy. I need your organization. I need your guidance. I need you to dance with me crazily, I need to hear you tell me about your life and I need to tell you about mine. I need to see you laugh when someone says something funny, because I probably found it funny too but I don't want to laugh by myself. I need you to teach me to play wii properly and I need you to include me in decisions so I know I am needed. I need you to tell me what to do when things go wrong, I love that you're friends with me just because I am me, no pretending. I need to know you are still there because I need you as my friend.

The biannual breakdown and how to survive it.

Every session in exams, students have a breakdown. Some will be worse than others, some will cry, others will sit and stare at a wall. Some will almost quit uni, others will forget to eat, sleep and shower because that takes away valuable study time. So what do you do when you wake up one morning and realise you have been sleeping in the dining room all night and you haven't showered in 3 days?

1. Call your Mother- or if you live with her, go and cry on her shoulder. (Fathers tend not to be quite so sympathetic in such matters). Tell her everything your thinking, how much you hate uni/school/your job. Tell her that your thinking about quitting, tell her that you need her to send food or come and pick you up. She'll probably have been expecting this phone call anyway.

2. Get rid of the energy drinks. These ultimately sap your energy and in addition to that, disrupt your bowel  movements. Stop now to avoid shitting yourself in an exam.

3. Take a shower. You stink. No one wants to come near you.

4. Eat something, preferably not something by Cadbury or Starburst or that came out of a vending machine.

5. Have a dance to some Calvin Harris. It's a guaranteed mood elevator.